Fathers Day

Happy Father’s Day to my dad… if I find a man even half as fantastic as my dad I will be happy.. he might be a grumpy git sometimes but he’s always got our backs and he loves us unconditionally.

I’m working today but see you later

Love you 😘

Em xo

Butterflies

Sometimes you’ve just got to go with your heart and take the risk. When butterflies come back in your stomach it makes you realise that time does heal. It takes time to trust people again but you just know when that time is right.. when that person is right!

~ happiness make you feel beautiful inside ~

Em xo

Smile

Happiness is definitely within, life is too short not to be happy and today I have a big happiness grin on my face 💕.. the second picture is my brother Ben who has autism, you may see his smile instantly but you won’t probably see he is wearing a ripped t-shirt! . This shows how sometimes smiling can hide a multitude of emotions. At the minute a lot is going on in our family with sorting out Ben’s future as he leaves his residential college in July and has no placement because of a massive failure by social services 😡 When he is anxious he rips t-shirts, he shows challenging behaviour but it’s not because he wants to it’s because he can’t explain his feelings in any other way 😢

But as a family we will give him the support he needs to get through this because that’s what we do because we love him .

Happiness comes in many forms so just go with the happiness of the moment and take one day at a time because happiness is not a given!

~never give up on happiness ~

Em xo

Passage over time

Life changes, people change! social media has a way of reminding us what went on before.. if only it could predict the future! 

Things happen and sometimes our reactions are to delete and block instead of facing what scares us most..the truth! 

Could you imagine if there was a world where when you post a picture or status you could never delete it? , it would be a lasting reminder good or bad… may be then we would think twice about our actions. 

I’m writing this because I’ve realised that a part of my history has been deleted as if it never happened, pictures gone, meaningful statuses deleted, people unfollowed or blocked just a whole chapter GONE 😢and it’s sad, I know it’s just how life goes but it shouldn’t be like this. We should keep those memories alive because it happened, it was real in that moment  and that’s all that matters. 

Then if we look back at those memories we might not feel the need to bad mouth those people to score points, to tell our variations of the truth to control how new people see us. 

~love life good or bad, be brave~ 

Em xo 

Truth

I was trying to find the right words to say on this subject then up popped this on FB. Some people will always try to smear mud on your character but the truth will come out and eventually everyone will see right through those lies. If you want to know anything about me then ask ME! Don’t listen to the person who would rather try to destroy me than admit that they once loved me!

Ooh and here’s some pictures of me being happy , happy that I can finally be myself 💕

~forever lie and you’ll forever be alone~

Em xo

Repeat cycle

I definitely love all things psychological, the human mind and behaviours fascinate me.. Again through study I’ve revisited the “nature v nurture” debate and the “dysfunctional” family theory. It is a fact that good or bad people learn how to act by copying what their parents do or did… so we could define this as “history repeating itself”

History does repeat itself, it’s a part of the human behaviour train and as I’ve talked about before it inevitably results in the need for people to reinvent themselves when they realise people have seen them for their true colours so it’s move on time … 

But is this move on time or is it move back to people or situations they once knew? . The pattern emerges… social media is a great tool for going back in time, a picture appears of someone in their past, do they ignore it or do they “like” it . The reinventor will always go for the last option because no matter what it’s about getting what they want. I suppose this comes back inevitably to narcissistic traits? 

So the cycle goes on rewind , repeat, reinvent! 

God that was a bit heavy .. well I have been on a night shift 😂

The one thing that is clear though is the reinventor never goes back to the one person who knows them better than themselves because that would mean they had to say sorry and sorry is not an option in their world! 

~be honest to yourself and others~ 

Em xo 

Time is a healer

They say time is a great healer and I think this is true. These are 2 pictures of me the first is me now nearly 10 months after my relationship ended. The lower one was me 2 1/2 stone heavier in weight, forcing a smile out to make the world believe I was good… I wasn’t good at all. I wish things had turned out differently but that’s life, something’s are just not meant to be. But the greatest thing I learned is that it’s more important to love yourself than be loved . I’ve found that love for my life again . I’m still not totally confident in some social situations but I’m getting there 😊. I made a big decision this week for my future and this time I’m ready for the career of my dreams

Anxiety and depression will always be with me , they will not define me though .

~live for the moment ~

Em xo

Thinking

Just don’t ghost people

Thinking 

Do you ever wonder if people who were in your past still think about you? 

I think this is a tough one because the heart says yes but the mind says no?? 

Some people can disassociate really easily, where as me I’m an analyser. 

As I’ve said before you don’t realise how quickly life moves on and how many people actually pass through your lifetime and yes I’m certain some people are sent to your life for a reason be it good or bad. 

I am quite a forgiving person and like to see the best in people, sadly people are not like that in return for me (it usually ends with me being ghosted then forever!) but I’m not going to change me as a person just because other people are basically arses! 

I’m off work this week but it’s an important one for my family in terms of what happens to my disabled brother in the future, today we have a meeting with social services and it’s not going to be good 😢

So when people out there think they have a hard life just because they only have 400 followers on Instagram or 5000 friends on Facebook or that only 1 person liked their profile pictures just think about families who struggle every day to cope with caring responsibilities, who have little to no support or help… this shit is the real shit that social media never reports! 

~treat others like you want to be treated~

Em xo